Education

How to Control Anger: 7 Tips to Stay as Calm

Update: 18/07/2016
Did you accept the anger invitation today?
 

How to Control Anger: 7 Tips to Stay as Calm

 
Picture this: you wake up in the morning and its pouring\r\noutside. So you have to skip going out for a jog (which gets you a little\r\nannoyed). It's breakfast time, and your cook doesn't show up. Being in a hurry,\r\nyou rush out without a wholesome meal (more annoyance). You need to make it to\r\na meeting at 10 AM but you are stuck in a never ending traffic jam (annoyance\r\nsuddenly turns into anger). You somehow make it to the meeting but it doesn't\r\ngo as planned (anger level starts to increase). You have a long argument with a\r\ncolleague (you are at the verge of screaming). You try to order a good lunch to\r\nlift your mood but the restaurant management messes up the delivery (anger\r\nlevel hits the roof). Then you are stuck in traffic again on your way back from\r\nwork trying to make it for your best friend's dinner party (you are exploding\r\nby now and cursing at everyone).

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\r\nAccording to authors Ronald T. Potter-Efron and Patricia S. Potter-Efron of the\r\nbookLetting Go ofAnger, an anger invitation is anything that happens that\r\ngives you an opportunity to get mad.”
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\r\nAs much as we seek inner peace, the truth is, it takes just a few seconds and a\r\nturn of events to make us get angry. And this is not a one-off event; it is\r\npretty much every day of our lives in the fast paced, city life. We are\r\nconstantly angry or annoyed about anything and everything – the traffic, the\r\nweather, the government, the state of affairs, work life, weight issues, not\r\nmeeting targets, a fight with a friend, or the autoricksaw drivers trying to\r\ncheat us. There’s no respite.
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\r\nAnger, the volatile emotion, may not result in a pleasant experience but the\r\nfact is that it is an important form of expression, where you let out your\r\nfeelings. Therefore, it is okay to get angry and express how you feel, or even\r\nput the energy to good use. Excessive or chronic anger, on the other hand, is\r\nwhat has repercussions on yourhealth,\r\nwhere it brings about physiological and biological changes affecting the heart\r\nrate,blood pressure, anxiety levels, etc; and hampers relationships with\r\nnear and dear ones as you land up hurting their sentiments.
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\r\nThe Repercussions of Excessive Anger
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\r\nAccording to a study done by the University of Pittsburg, negative emotions\r\nlike anger, anxiety, and depression not only affect the functioning of the\r\nheart but also increase the risk of stroke. Persisting stress increases the\r\nrisk for atherosclerosis and cardiovascular disease by evoking negative\r\nemotions that, in turn, raise the levels of pro-inflammatory chemicalsin\r\nthe body.
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\r\nIn the book, Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men: How to Free Yourself from the Grip\r\nof Anger and Get More Out of Life, the author, Thomas J. Harbin, says,\r\n“Research indicates that high levels of hostility lead to ulcers,heart\r\ndisease, and other physical illnesses. Too much anger drives others away and\r\nleaves you alone. Too much anger ruins marriages, keeps you from advancing at\r\nwork, and acts like a ball and chain, dragging you down and hindering your\r\nprogress in most areas of life.”
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\r\nRenowned American psychologist Charles Spielberger, who has done various\r\nstudies related to anger, anxiety and depression, had developed the ‘state\r\ntrait anger scale’. He defined state anger as a temporary emotional state, and\r\ntrait anger as a general tendency to react angrily to perceive situations. The\r\nfact is that emotions vary from people to people, and also their ability to\r\ndeal with it. Some people are ‘hot-headed’ as compared to others, and as such,\r\nhave problems dealing with anger. We all react to anger, both consciously and\r\nunconsciously.

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How to Curb Anger

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Here are some tips that can help you

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1. Work it Out

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Like they say, when in doubt work it out. Physical activity\r\nis one of the best outlets to release all the negativity from your mind. When\r\nyour mind is clouded, trying even some basicexercisessuch asstretchingcan\r\nhelp you feel lighter. It will help release tension and free your mind. If you\r\nhave access to the gym, try to burn some extracalorieswithout of\r\ncourse straining yourself, or just go out for a jog.

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2. Express Your Anger

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“Suppressing or holding in anger is unhealthy. Therefore, we\r\nshould not hesitate to talk about it. In fact, emotional expression can be in\r\nthe form of art,dance, movement, written expression or any other form of\r\ncreative expression. Anger, if expressed productively, can have a positive\r\nfunction. Remember, it is normal to get angry, but we must be able to\r\nchannelize it in the correct direction, rather than simply suppressing it,”\r\nsays Dr. Roshni Sondhi, Psychologist, Department of Mental Health, Fortis\r\nHealthcare.

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Most experts also suggest addressing the issue and\r\nexpressing yourself by using “I”. Example: I am angry because so and so forth.\r\nMy feelings were hurt for these reasons. This will also keep you from blaming\r\nor criticising others.

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3. Breathe, and Breathe

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There’s a reason whyyogahelps in calming us\r\ndown. Focusing on our breathing helps to channelise the energies within us,\r\nthus bringing about a change. Savasana, also known as the corpse pose, is\r\nconsidered to be one of the most effective tools to curb anger. Here, you need\r\nto lie down on the floor, with arms and legs relaxed. Palms should be faced\r\nupwards and feet open. Then just close your eyes and focus on yourbreathing,\r\nas the tempo stabilizes, making you feel relaxed. Even a few minutes of\r\nmeditation can work wonders.

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4. Count Till 10

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Most experts often suggest counting till 10 before\r\nexpressing one’s anger. “Neurological anger response lasts less than two\r\nseconds,” says Ronald T. Potter-Efron, co-author of the book Letting Go of\r\nAnger. Therefore, that little time frame is enough to suppress one’s anger,\r\nhelping him or her to think before reacting at the heat of the moment.

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5. The Power of Water

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“Anger is like flowing water; there's nothing wrong with it\r\nas long as you let it flow. Hate is like stagnant water…” – C. JoyBell C.

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Anger needs to flow out of your body for you to function\r\nproperly. And what better way than using water’s calming effects to cool down.\r\nThere’s nothing like diving into a pool of water andswimminglaps\r\nafter laps to release all that tension in your mind. Besides losing somecalories,\r\nit is also a great way to rejuvenate. Even listening to the sound of water\r\nfalling or the waves in the sea can bring you inner peace. Or just go in for a\r\nnice long showerto destress and unclog your mind. Tell yourself, let it\r\nflow.

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6. Take a Break

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“Move yourself away from the heated situation (if possible).\r\nIn times of crisis, or in the moment of a heated discussion or anger outburst,\r\nit is best to take a time out and temporarilywalkaway from the\r\nsituation. It gives the person time to calm down,” says Dr. Roshni Sondhi.

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Giving a break will also help you reinterpret the situation,\r\nwhere maybe you spot your own mistakes and deal with the situation in a better\r\nmanner.

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7. Act the Opposite

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“One of the quickest ways to change a painful feeling is to\r\nact the opposite.Smileinstead of frown. Speak softly rather than\r\nloudly. Relax instead of tighten. Disengage rather than attack. Empathize\r\nrather than judge,” says authors Matthew Mckay and Peter Rogers ofThe Anger\r\nControl Workbook. Most of us will also remember the popular Hindi movieMunna\r\nBhai M.B.B.S., where Dr. J.C. Asthana (Boman Irani) uses laughter as a medium\r\nto let out his feeling of anger.

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As mentioned in the book,Anger: Wisdom from Cooling\r\nthe Flamesby Thich Nhat Hanh, “According to the Buddha’s teachings, the\r\nmost basic condition for happiness is freedom. Here we do not mean political\r\nfreedom, but freedom from the mental formations of anger, despair, jealousy and\r\ndelusion. These mental formations are described as poisons. As long as these\r\npoisons are still in our heart, happiness cannot be possible.”

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So it’s time. Let go of your anger.

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By NDTV

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Soure from: http://food.ndtv.com/health/how-to-control-anger-7-tips-to-stay-as-calm-as-the-buddha-1413848

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Plavaneeta Borah

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